my heart hasn’t smiled in a long time. && i’m not quite sure if it’s worth this constant pain. i Googled “my boyfriend doesn’t forgive me” and found a few people in my situation asking for advice. I started bawling when I read this:

“Let this go, you both need a lot of healing, and time apart, out of relationships. Understand, you both have too many resentments to even give each other half a chance, and while you don’t see your lying as a big deal he does, and hasn’t gotten over it, and never will while you two are still not able to even argue without past hurts being brought up. Not only that, what broke you up in the first place, is still very much alive, and well and working against you.
You are forcing things now, not working together, and thats typical when a relationship fails, and even the break up failed, because their was no time taken for a proper healing, but I doubt either of you will understand until you really start hating each other.
You could try counseling together, but without hands on guidance, neither one of you will find a way to help each other until there is a peaceful, thoughtful time away from each other.”

Ugh. I’m so FUCKING tired of crying!! I feel like he doesn’t give a fuck anyway. If he did, why would he keep bringing up all these negative feelings instead of trying to move past them?? So now I’m stuck here crying my eyes out and hurting, while he’s sleeping peacefully. Like, really? I have no faith in anything anymore.. I’m just hoping I wake up from this horrible nightmare.

We could’ve had something amazing.

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