people are so selfish. why bother?
May 22, 2011
I’m so fucking tired of this shit. It’s really getting old, I have no one to talk to…well, no one who listens. I’m tired of crying and feeling worthless. What’s the point?
This shit is CRAZY!!!!! Is this the Salem Witch Trials?
May 21, 2011
my heart hasn’t smiled in a long time. && i’m not quite sure if it’s worth this constant pain. i Googled “my boyfriend doesn’t forgive me” and found a few people in my situation asking for advice. I started bawling when I read this:
“Let this go, you both need a lot of healing, and time apart, out of relationships. Understand, you both have too many resentments to even give each other half a chance, and while you don’t see your lying as a big deal he does, and hasn’t gotten over it, and never will while you two are still not able to even argue without past hurts being brought up. Not only that, what broke you up in the first place, is still very much alive, and well and working against you.
You are forcing things now, not working together, and thats typical when a relationship fails, and even the break up failed, because their was no time taken for a proper healing, but I doubt either of you will understand until you really start hating each other.
You could try counseling together, but without hands on guidance, neither one of you will find a way to help each other until there is a peaceful, thoughtful time away from each other.”
Ugh. I’m so FUCKING tired of crying!! I feel like he doesn’t give a fuck anyway. If he did, why would he keep bringing up all these negative feelings instead of trying to move past them?? So now I’m stuck here crying my eyes out and hurting, while he’s sleeping peacefully. Like, really? I have no faith in anything anymore.. I’m just hoping I wake up from this horrible nightmare.
We could’ve had something amazing.
May 13, 2011
am i wrong for despising and HATING every woman you’ve ever been with? like, i really don’t want to do anything that reminds me of them.
bleh.
May 11, 2011
Maybe…I expect too much from you. Maybe…I expect too much from our relationship. I just want to be happy. I want to wake up in the morning with a smile on my face and not go to bed at night with tear stained cheeks. I want.. HAVE to make a better life for myself. I admit I’ve grown accustomed to my parents taking care of me. But is it really so bad to like other people taking care of you? A relationship is supposed to be a solid bond, with both people being there for each other (emotionally, physically, financially). Neither of us are fully supportive of the other. It’s a constant struggle. I need to be able to depend on you and I want you to depend on me.
Ugh. I have so much to say and yet no words are forming.
May 10, 2011
i really shouldn’t have to repeatedly ask the same question. do i speak German?
May 10, 2011
people are so fucked up. but…why am i surprised?
April 19, 2011
I’ve said several times that my Lord knows my heart.
I think I need to start listening to it.
April 19, 2011
Remember when we were together and i told you I’d always be there for you? Well that’s still true. I’ll always care for you.
The most terrible way to miss someone is to be sitting next to them, knowing things will never be the same.
Maybe..one day. We determine our own DESTINY. Don’t let your dreams slip away.
April 9, 2011
my heart breaks a little each day. i’m crying out for help but my cries fall upon deaf ears. no one cares. why should they? they don’t understand. && i can’t express myself well enough for anyone to want to try and understand. the one person who knows everything…doesn’t listen to me. crying myself to sleep…the anxiety…the horrible feeling in my stomach that won’t go away…is only a preface. the real story has yet to begin. hopefully it has a good ending. i keep praying for it and my God knows my heart. i hope things get better. i’m not strong enough for it.
March 30, 2011
I really don’t like where we are right now. I get the feeling I’m not wanted. I know you look at me a lot differently, and it sucks =(
Thats all.
